I had an interesting talk with someone I haven't spoken to in a very long time. We were reliving the good old days back in school. Talking to him was like a self-improvement experience.

I always felt awkward, like there was something wrong with me and my personality. Talking to him made me feel less like that. He remembered things that I didn't even remember myself and I never knew I could have an impact on anyone's life. Well, you can say that I was given an ego boost. But it does make a person feel better know that they're not invisible and it sure did help me become more accepting of me. It's just that sometimes, shit happens to good people... =)


I had a talk with my piano teacher. I told her how I've been feeling off lately and I haven't been very focused on anything. The huge relief was that she understood completely how I felt and she gets emotionally low periods like I do. It was comforting to know that I'm not messed up and I'm definitely not alone.

That talk with my teacher triggered a whole other thing. Tattoo. She got one quite recently and she told me the guy is awesome. She invited me to go down with her to the shop on Tuesday because she wanted to get another one. I liked the soft finish of her tattoo so I agreed to go check the place and the guy out.

Since I've been sort of scared and a little bit superstitious as well (due to my upbringing.. hee), I decided to let the heavens and my gut feeling decide things for me. The day went extremely well and everything seemed to fall nicely into place. And the huge deciding factor was, I loved the artist's idea for mine. It's very unique! And unfortunately, it's a bit hard for me to explain what it looks like now, but I'll definitely post a picture if I get it.

Anyway, I've already made an appointment for next week and I'm crazy excited about it. BUT! My sister is not... One sister is on for it, but the other is far from it. I've been given mixed opinions from her. I was really surprised and heart-broken when I found out her mental perception of me. I'm apparently someone who is rash, doesn't think about the consequences and is bent on getting it no matter what.

That, of course, is far from the truth. I've been thinking about it and constantly modifying my design for over a year. It's a liberating feeling knowing that I finally get to have something that is my own and reflective of who I am. And it's really upsetting. My parents are already against it and I intend to keep it from them. The last thing I need is not to have 100% support and their opinion matters is extremely important to me.

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On a lighter note, I got an interview! From Mr. Bean! I'm so amused and so happy. I really like the brand, ever since it got an image overhaul. And I would like to meet the people who created the current image.

BUT! I may not take the job because the place is really hard to get to! It's at Aljunied and that's relatively close to my house, but it's in an industrial area and really far from the MRT station. It requires tons of walking. The alternative route is to take 3 different bus services from my house, which is crazy as well.

So, the best case scenario is if there's a free bus shuttle from Aljunied MRT station to the industrial area!

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Wow! It's been a crazy week. So much ups, downs and possibilities. But it does beat having nothing at all =)

Today's one of those roller coaster, down days. I'm depressed from staying home too much. I'm becoming a hermit who doesn't get out much. All I do is transit between 2 houses and make a trip down to Woodlands once a week. I want to go out and play, watch a movie, chill at Starbucks and get a ridiculously large drink that takes me forever to finish. Or a trip to the library will be good too.

But then again, even though I want to do all these things, I seem to have lost all my motivation to go anywhere. I have this list of things to do because I knew I would get bored, so I wanted to keep myself occupied. But it's not working anymore. I don't even want to go for piano. I'm not sure why. It's not that I don't want to go out, piano has become the last thing I want to do.

Where has my drive and passion gone?

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By the way, I cut my hair. Short.

I like it. It's a nice change.

I may decide to go shorter and add purple streaks in it.

But then again, I can't because I have to be prepared for any potential interviews.

Ohh and I don't have this thing called cash.

-_-

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I'm still excited about this though...

Do you ever wonder what you are like through other people's eyes? Or what they think of you and your personality? Well, I have! Too much for my own good actually. I think so much such that I become almost obsessed and in a negative way as well.

Anyway, I was talking to my secondary school friend recently, and I wondering how different I am from back then. I feel a world of difference. I think I was retarded then and didn't know better. Now, I'm about still the same, but way less than last time.

It's a rather strange kind of feeling I get that I can't quite explain. Or maybe it's just me over thinking and over analysing again =p

National Geographic is awesome. I love the show Naked Science. It's a documentary that deals with all sorts of stuff like the universe, deep sea volcanoes, global warming, climate changes, aliens, etc. The show is an eye-opener and I get so fascinated every time I watch it.

Well, the topic on the last two episodes were rather depressing. One was about melting glaciers at the poles and the other one was about the possibility of another ice age. Basically, as a result of global warming, the climate is at stake and within the next 100 years or so, there is a 50% chance of another ice age. Not a very hopeful figure, I thought.

It got me thinking. Within the next 100 years, if nothing is done, my future children will have to live through and suffer the consequences. So I decided, I will never have kids if that really is the case. I would rather not have kids than risk having them being born into a world of chaos.

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Random, huh? That's what happens when I have too much time on my hands. I think... Too much for my own good... Haha!

I've been forgotten and left out yet again.

I don't mean to sound childish or anything, it sucks.

Trying to get back in touch, reconnect, and maybe rekindle friendships that were once lost.

Apparently I'm the only dumb idiot who thinks there's even a chance of that happening.

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Seriously, why do I even bother?

But then again, I don't exactly have many I can count on.

So maybe that's why...

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Damn... I'm so pathetic...